VO: The nation's favorite celebrities...

There's a fact for you.

VO: ..paired up with an expert... We're like a girl band!

VO ..and a classic car.

Give it some juice, Myrie, give it some juice.

VO: Their mission - to scour Britain for antiques.

I'm brilliant at haggling.

Who knew?

VO: The aim - to make the biggest profit at auction.

CRISSY: I can't believe that!

VO: But it's no easy ride.

TRISHA: What's that smell?

AMIR: The clutch!

VO: Who will find a hidden gem?

That's very art deco, innit?

VO: Take the biggest risk?

It's half toy, it's half furniture.

VO: Will anybody follow expert advice?

That's irrelevant.

VO: There will be worthy winners... ..and valiant losers.

No!

VO: Put your pedal to the metal.

Woohoo!

(CHUCKLES) VO: This is the Celebrity Antiques Road Trip!

Not 'alf!

Whizzing through the magnificent Midlands countryside in the Rover P6, we're joined by two of the country's most well-known and loved radio broadcasters, Mark Radcliffe and Edith Bowman.

MARK (MR): It's almost like you and I are in a PG Wodehouse book, right now, isn't it?

Do you know what I mean?

VO: For decades, these two smooth talkers have introduced the nation to some of the most influential music.

Mark started his epic radio career in the 1980s, becoming one of the most distinctive voices on the airwaves.

EDITH (EB): When I was growing up in my wee fishing village in Anstruther, you know, they used to listen to you at night when you used to do the night-time show on... MR: Yeah, the graveyard shift... EB: Yeah, on Radio 1.

..they used to call it.

Ten till midnight, yeah.

Go to bed and you'd kind of introduce me to, like, Sonic Youth and stuff and just... Yeah.

..it was an amazing doorway into this world that I was just fascinated by.

Oh, I'm...

I'm really pleased to hear that.

VO: Edith is an award-winning radio, TV and podcast broadcaster and has become a regular fixture on our TV screens.

Are you into antiques, then?

Do you know anything about it?

Is there stuff that you're looking for?

I normally tend to go for the stuff that is worth nothing.

Yeah.

I have no idea what is kind of the hot seller at auctions right now, you know.

MR: No.

Well, I suppose... EB: All that kind of stuff.

..we have to rely on our world-leading expert guides for that, don't we?

VO: What an intro!

Come on then, let's meet 'em.

In the iconic DMC DeLorean are pros... Natasha Raskin Sharp and Paul Martin.

NATASHA (NS): Is this your first time driving a DeLorean?

PAUL (PM): It is, yes.

I've never been in a DeLorean before.

You've taken to it like a duck to water.

Oh, hold on.

My elbows are getting a bit grassy.

(CHUCKLES) VO: Oh, spoke a bit too soon there, Natasha.

MR: We're primarily known MR: as being DJs, and so... EB: Yeah.

..will they think we're looking for... EB: Decks.

(CHUCKLES) MR: ..decks, which I'm not!

EB: No.

MR: And vinyl.

EB: Vinyl.

MR: Which I'm not.

I think they'd like to find a star item each.

Absolutely... And I bet it would be music memorabilia.

To find that rare vinyl.

PM: Yeah.

Yeah.

NS: That mint condition... PM: And that... NS: ..signed... PM: Exactly.

..Bob Dylan, Blood On The Tracks.

Something like that.

Sell for thousands of pounds.

PM: Yeah.

NS: Go home with the glory.

VO: Well, who doesn't, eh?

My Holy Grail would be to find a 1958 Martin Gibson or Guild acoustic guitar, cuz that's the year of my birth.

But if I found that today, it certainly won't be going into auction, it'd be going home in the boot of my car.

VO: Better keep my eye on you then.

Our antiques tour takes us around the Midlands before a showdown auction at Bourne in Lincolnshire.

We begin in Coventry at Antiques In A Barn.

EB: Hold on, is that...?

That's the car... MR: That's amazing.

EB: That's the car from Back To The Future.

MR: I've never seen Back To The Future, you know.

EB: What?!

MR: I know.

Bizarre, isn't it?

How can I be in a car with you and you've never seen Back To The Future?

MR: (CHUCKLES) VO: Shocking!

MR: That's extraordinary...

I can't believe this is the experts' car.

MR: I know, I know.

EB: What?!

I'm gonna get a drive in this, for sure.

MR: Right then.

Go on.

EB: Come on then.

You go.

EB: On you go.

No.

MR: Ugh!

Go on!

Oh, alright.

VO: Get in, you two.

Your experts await.

This store is set in a barn dating back to the 1770s, and is owned by Malcolm.

Caught ya.

PM: Hello, Edith.

EB: Hi, Paul!

Yeah, you caught me spinning disks... How are you?

Aw, amazing!

I like the look of that one.

Gary Moore.

Oh, nice.

Are we going to buy some vinyl?

PM: The right vinyl, maybe... EB: OK. ..but it's not in here.

Why don't we start down that end?

EB: A lot to choose from.

PM: This barn is stacked PM: to the gunwales, isn't it?

EB: Yeah.

OK. PM: Ready?

We'll find out... EB: I'll follow.

Let's do it.

PM: ..what we can find.

EB: Yeah.

VO: Good plan.

Now, where are the others?

Hey, Tash.

Oh, Mark!

Hi.

How are you?

How you doing?

Are you well?

I'm really well.

Yeah, yeah.

I'm...I'm quite excited, actually.

I'm clutter averse in real life, you see.

So when I come in here, I'm sort of overloaded with things.

It sort...

It freaks me out slightly, but... NS: Anything we should steer clear of?

I hate old, brown, heavy furniture and stuff like that.

Nothing brown.

I would say, let's not set any rules.

MR: OK. VO: Wise words.

Right, now time to start spending that £400 each.

Edith, there you are.

Come and see this, what do you think of this?

EB: She drew me in.

PM: That's a good sign.

EB: Tree hugging.

PM: She's drawn you in.

EB: Yeah.

PM: Do you know, I do a bit of tree hugging.

I love trees.

I mean, but...

It's good for the soul.

Oh, they really are.

VO: Stay focused!

It's got imperfections and stuff to it.

Like, there's a EB: bit of damage.

PM: Yeah, there's a little bit on the mount Can I have a quick look?

Yeah, go for it.

What do you think?

It's...it's Victorian.

I can tell straightaway.

But it's...

It's kind of in the school of Dante Rossetti and William Morris, you know, the Pre-Raphaelites.

Yeah.

So it's got a touch of the Pre-Raphaelite Brotherhood, the young radicals, wanting to... EB: OK. PM: ..change the art world.

VO: In 1848, this group of English painters, poets, and art critics sought a return to the detail and intense colors of Quattrocento Italian art.

She's kissing two carved love hearts, can you see that?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I can...

Which are slightly overlapping, intertwined.

And you don't think the damage is too much, around the frame, and the...?

No, the damage is on the mount.

It's consistent with its age.

Yeah.

Not sure of the price.

It's got £95 on it.

But it's a watercolor and I'd say that's circa PM: 1880, 1890.

EB: Oh, wow!

Towards the end of the Victorian period.

Something really symbolic I've just spotted is the ivy clinging around the tree.

Ivy not wanting to let go, "I love you forever."

EB: Oh.

PM: So... You're going to make me cry.

VO: Oh, you softie.

What do you think we should try and go for, price wise?

65.

65.

OK. Yeah.

We want to sell it for 100.

(CHUCKLES) We want to make a profit, PM: don't we?

EB: OK. PM: Let's face it.

EB: Yeah.

OK, let's do it.

We want to win this, don't we?

Do you want to win this?

I think so.

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, definitely want to win it.

Well, you've known Mark a long time.

I bet he's quite competitive.

I think more so than he's letting on.

More so... Oh, right, OK. VO: Let's see if that's true.

Where have Mark and Natasha got to?

MR: Tasha?

NS: Mm-hm, mm-hm?

Oh.

Tasha, what do you think of these?

I... Good thoughts.

Good thoughts.

I really love the graphics.

I like this one.

It's a kind of bit sort of Dad's Army.

NS: Very much, very much.

MR: Isn't it?

You know, home front sort of thing.

I like the detail in the background.

I don't know what you think, and you know at auction...

I mean, I actually think the frame sort of cheapens them a bit, really.

It's just a kind of chain-store frame.

I think if you took them out of the frame and just displayed them...

I don't know how old they are though, but I really...

I find the graphics really strong and appealing.

I think...

I like the fact that you already... You don't think, you know, that the frame is killing the style NS: of these posters.

MR: Yeah.

Yeah.

VO: Good spot, Mark.

Dig on for victory.

I think it's such an iconic poster, we would be incredibly lucky were this an original '40s piece.

It won't be.

NS: It's not.

MR: It can't be.

No, it's not.

You can...

I can see from here that this is what I hope to be a mid-to-late-20th century repro.

NS: My guess is '70s.

MR: OK. And these did come back into vogue in that era.

VO: Well, this could be one to watch then.

Having a wee break there, Edith?

Ah, and he chances upon La Bowman, reclining in an antique bed.

Bonjour, monsieur...

I feel like I'm sort of intruding, really... No, I feel like I've got a picture of you in your sheepskin coat, weirdly enough.

AS DEL BOY: "This time, next week, Rodney, "we'll have lost £2.50 at auction."

It's a bit more Motson.

Bit more Motson than Del Boy, is it?

EB: Yeah!

MR: Yeah.

So have you found some stuff?

I think I have.

So I was just, you know, having a chill and...

Right.

..putting my feet up.

What about you?

Well, you were always easily pleased, weren't you?

You'd buy any old tat, you!

VO: Hey, cheeky.

MR: Right, I'll... EB: Ooh!

Well, I've not got...

I've not got anything yet.

So, apart from maybe this coat.

Well, time is of the essence, my friend, so...

I know.

I'll go and have a look.

MR: You take it easy.

EB: Get a... Get a shifty on.

VO: Oh, indeed.

Tasha?

Yeah?

What's caught your eye?

Well, I don't know anything about watches, but this is in a really gorgeous little box, which has got Edinburgh Castle on the front.

It makes it even more gorgeous, doesn't it?

That's Mauchline ware, so that comes from the west coast of Scotland, even though it's an Edinburgh scene.

VO: These Scottish wooden souvenirs were mainly made from sycamore and are known as Mauchline ware because the majority were created in the Ayrshire town of Mauchline.

NS: I love Mauchline ware, Mark.

MR: Right.

So, the box appeals to you in itself?

I liked...

I saw the box and then, you know, I don't know anything about watches, but this is a...

This...

I mean, it's definitely a watch.

Yeah.

Very trendy, right now, you know?

Are they?

Right, OK.

It's got something about... rubis on it.

So... Yeah, mm-hm.

..that... That sounds good.

It's like...

I don't know, is that... Would that be a silver watch?

It looks silver to me.

If you hold it in your hand, the inner casing, the inner casing that says rubis on it, put that in between your fingers.

Does it feel soft and flexible?

MR: A little bit.

NS: Does it feel like you could bend it quite easily?

Yeah, I think you probably could, with two hands.

Yeah, so that's silver... Rubis seems to be spelt with just an I, with no E in it.

OK, so rubis referring to the jewels that are in the movement.

NS: So... MR: Yeah.

Does it tell you how many there are?

I can't... Er, what does it say, there?

I think it says 13.

Great, because that means that there's more than the average.

Seven is your basic number of jewels.

13 is great.

You can have more.

And the jewels are serving a really particular purpose.

They're stopping the inner workings of the pocket watch from rubbing against one another and wearing.

So it's an attempt to keep more accurate time.

It's, uh, 70 for the watch, 45 for the box.

Seems quite a lot for a little box, that, so we'll have to have a good go at that, won't we?

VO: It's time for Mark to get that coat back on and bring out the Del Boy.

NS: So you're going for this?

MR: I think so.

OK, we're doing it.

Price dependent.

VO: Brace yourself, Malcolm!

MR: Malcolm.

Erm...

This is, you know, it's alright.

It's quite an average watch.

You know, a little sort of throwaway box.

I mean, you know, so the price...

The price together is 115.

So, I really...

I'm going to ask you to get me, you know, somewhere near to kind of... 50, 60 quid is what I'm looking at, really.

VO: Oh, crikey.

I'm going to say 60.

60 quid?

And 60 is definitely where I'm at.

I think...

I think...

I think 60's totally fair.

Three very crisp £20 notes.

Thank you very much.

That was amazing.

Lead the way!

MR: (CHUCKLES) NS: Malcolm.

We'll come again.

DEALER: (CHUCKLES) NS: Thanks!

DEALER: More than welcome.

MR: Bye bye.

VO: Success!

With the first item bought, that leaves Mark with £340 left.

VO: Having already spotted a mid-Victorian picture, how are Edith and Paul getting on?

I really like the decorative nature and color of this.

I've no idea if it's... tat or if it's actually...

But I don't know, there's something really nice I like about it.

Do you know, when you're holding that, looking at you holding it, it suits you.

It really works.

The whole thing... Do I need it filled with wine?

The whole thing works... A goblet!

Yeah, fill it with wine.

It's lovely, isn't it?

EB: What is it?

PM: This is a Victorian poser, PM: it's like a centerpiece... EB: OK. ..for a table or a mantelpiece.

Maybe a pair, one of a pair.

It's just really bright and vibrant.

I like it.

PM: It's beautiful glass.

EB: And I like how, yeah, I like how the glass is...

So, it's still...

The light can still kind of come through.

So when you're turning it... PM: Exactly.

EB: ..there, you can see the... PM: Exactly.

EB: Yeah.

It's very bohemian, and I love this sort of Castilian work up here.

The gilding is very, very good.

Erm, it's Victorian, mid Victorian, 1850.

I have to say, the condition is superb.

Because normally, on this gilding, it rubs, you get a lot of rub... EB: Yeah.

PM: ..where it's missing, and the blue will grin through.

But it's all there... You'd expect a little chip or something somewhere, EB: wouldn't you?

PM: You do, yeah.

VO: No price tag though.

PM: We've seen two things.

EB: Yeah.

Maybe we could do a deal on two things.

OK. VO: Time to get Malcolm over, to see what he can do.

Malcolm?

Hello, mate.

EB: Hi!

DEALER: Hello!

There's two things that I really like.

So we're thinking of either this or this beautiful Victorian watercolor.

It would be massively generous and let you have the watercolor for £60.

PM: OK. EB: OK. PM: And this for...?

DEALER: 70.

PM: 70.

EB: 70.

PM: Well, it's hard to choose, isn't it, between the two?

EB: Yeah.

PM: Maybe we should buy the two.

EB: Yeah.

PM: Yes, I think you've been really generous with the watercolor.

Oh thank you very much indeed.

EB: Amazing.

Yeah.

EB: We'll take both, please.

PM: Yeah.

DEALER: Right, thank you.

EB: Yeah?

Thank you so much.

DEALER: Thank you.

VO: Great deal, team.

So, with the total cost of £130, that leaves £270 left.

Back in the DeLorean, Mark's having a good old reminisce.

I got to know David Bowie a little bit and he was my...

He was my hero, musically.

He's sort of been my musical idol.

So I probably met him sort of, you know, 10 times or something.

NS: Really?

MR: And one time, he called me into his dressing room and he was doing a greatest hits set.

He said, "Shall I put... "Shall I put Ziggy Stardust here after Heroes?

"Or... Or shall I put Hang On To Yourself there "and then do Changes?"

And I'm trying to give him a serious response, but having an out-of-body experience and thinking, "How can it have happened that me, "who bought the Ziggy Stardust album "with my money from my paper round in Bolton, "and listened to it lying on my bed... "How can it be that I'm now in the same room with that guy?"

NS: And he's asking your advice!

MR: And he's asking me!

MUSIC: "Love You Till Tuesday" by David Bowie VO: Mark and Natasha are making their way to Birmingham.

Here, in the heart of the city, is Key Hill Cemetery.

Today, it houses some of Britain's last surviving catacombs.

Josie Wall from the Jewellery Quarter's Cemeteries Project is on hand to explain how, in the 19th century, the Victorians tried to change the way we bury our dead.

Hey, Josie!

JOSIE: Oh, hi there.

MR: Hello!

You've just found me cleaning this gravestone.

Found you cleaning a gravestone.

First... First question - we find you in full sort of Victorian Gothic apparition style, with a white face in a graveyard - are you real?

JOSIE: I am real, don't worry.

MR: You are real!

VO: Thank goodness for that!

Garden cemetery is a phrase I hadn't heard until today.

So, what was the idea then?

You had a cemetery, but it was also sort of like a park, a garden, in which people would come and promenade at the weekends and have a picnic amongst the gravestones or something?

JOSIE: That's exactly it.

People thought that if you were burying your dead in a beautiful landscape... MR: Yeah.

JOSIE: ..it would be a comforting thing to the bereaved, to be surrounded by the beauty of nature and, then, as you say, also a place for leisure.

In fact, we start getting public parks because, eventually, people realized that you don't actually need burials in order to have a green space to enjoy.

So the cemeteries come first.

MR: Oh, right!

VO: Key Hill Cemetery was opened in 1836.

Faced with the problem of overcrowding, and in an attempt to capitalize on the space available, the cemetery owners introduced catacombs.

MR: Walking through the park from a distance, you'd think this was an ivy-covered wall, which it kind of is... Yeah.

But then, if you take the time to look and pull back... NS: Gosh, yeah.

..you find amazing things.

So what is... What is a catacomb?

What's it... What's it for?

So it was quite a short-lived fashion in Britain for catacomb burials, inspired by the early Roman Christian catacombs beneath Rome, where you had sort of individual Christian burials, but in the tunnels underneath the city.

VO: Those who owned the cemetery also built the catacombs as a way to make money and pitched it to the wealthy as the most desired way to be buried.

Can we go in then?

Can...

I mean, I'm expecting some kind of real ghost-train experience in here.

I promise there's no ghosts.

Erm... We can go inside cuz actually, we've just had some renovation work done and a new safety floor, so you'll be the first people to get to visit.

JOSIE: And come this way.

MR: Wow!

NS: Oh, wow!

MR: Wow!

Look at you, with your lantern, Josie.

I know.

Josie, that just completes the look.

It does, it really completes...

This is sort of...

I don't know whether...

It's kind of impressive and also...

..I don't know, a bit gruesome, somehow.

Yeah, dark and grim and damp and...

It is.

Yeah, everything you would expect it to be.

VO: Get your torches out.

If you come down to this one here, you can see how they were laid out, ready to be used.

VO: Catacombs like this one would have been purchased by a family, so they could arrange multiple coffins in them and all be together.

So we've got a piece of wood across from a ledge on either side.

And originally, there would have been several of those on each layer, so that you could have three coffins on the top, three in the middle and three on the floor.

So this is a nine-berth catacomb.

MR: So when all nine berths were filled, they would then seal it, would they?

Yeah.

So sometimes they would be sealed.

And you can see one behind you that's been sealed with a monument, with the names on there.

But sometimes, they were left with just the iron gate on them originally.

MR: You know, I mean, I don't think I'd like the thought of being in here in the damp and cold, in perpetuity.

Is that why they died out?

I think that is why they died out.

Because, although it wasn't always this dark in here, because we did have skylights in the roof and the corridor was open at both ends originally, it was still cold and dark with the British climate.

So I think catacombs work better in a country like France or Spain or Italy, where you've got a hot, dry climate than they do in Britain.

VO: Even though the Victorians didn't succeed long term with the use of catacombs becoming the way we bury our dead, they're still a fascinating piece of history we can still visit today.

Right, let's find Edith and Paul in their Rover P6.

We are like the Krays, aren't we, in this?

EB: I love it.

PM: It's so funny... No one is going to mess with us in this car.

Alright?!

(CHUCKLES) VO: They mean business.

Hey, look, we've got two items in the bag.

Is that good?

Are we in a good place?

I think we're in a good place.

I need to not be so emotionally attached to the item.

PM: Sure.

EB: Or allow myself to have an emotional reaction to it.

Yes.

I've got to think more business-like about it in terms of what is going to make the most money.

Yeah.

VO: Set with a game plan, they're off to Solihull to spend their £270 at Yoxall Antiques.

This antique shop has been a family-run business since 1989.

(PLAYS A FANFARE) PM: (CHUCKLES) VO: Oh, blowing your own trumpet again, are we, Paul?

Paul, come and see this, look.

Found our car.

Oh, yes, look!

The Rover P6 2000.

That's exactly the same model, isn't it?

And of course, built up the road.

EB: Perfect.

I think this...this model was in production for around about 10 years.

VO: Nice.

Spot on.

But you've got antiques to find.

Oh, what's this?

EB: Paul?

PM: Yeah.

Would you come and have a look at this for me, please?

What have you found?

This corner cabinet?

It is a corner cupboard.

A Georgian corner cupboard.

Yeah, George III, that's about sort of late 1700s.

1780, 1790.

EB: See, to me... PM: Cuban mahogany.

It looks really expensive to me.

From... Well, they used to be in their day, cuz they're ... EB: Yeah.

PM: ..beautifully made.

I mean, it's hard to make a bow fronted corner cupboard.

There's a lot of skill that's gone into that, as opposed to a flat-fronted one.

And it's got all this detailed cornice, which is really nice.

I like the hinges.

I like the escutcheons.

It's got a lock and a key, and that looks original.

And there you can see, look at that, it's got a fitted interior with some shelves and some little drawers, look!

Oh, that's nice.

EB: I like the idea of buying a piece of furniture.

PM: I do, as well.

It's a... EB: You know, that idea of being part of EB: that recycling process... PM: Mm!

..in terms of, you know...

It's not always about buying new furniture... PM: It's not, is it?

EB: ..and look what you can get!

VO: Exactly.

And its price is £50.

Storage is expensive.

Mm-hm.

And if we can pick that up for 30 quid, that's cheap storage for anybody.

There we go, that's how we're selling it.

PM: Isn't it?

EB: (CHUCKLES) Yeah.

PM: Right, let's move on.

EB: OK. VO: Tactics.

I like it.

I like this.

It's a nice photo frame.

It's understated.

There's no pretense.

It's what it is.

And that, with a photo frame in it, with this wonderful beveled glass, everything is right about it.

It's good, it's good, it's good.

Edith, come and look at this.

It's a great country-house piece.

EB: Oh.

PM: It's a silver photo frame.

PM: Doesn't that look great?

EB: I like it.

PM: Stands well.

An easel frame.

EB: Can I have a hold?

Oh, yeah.

Oh, it's nice.

Substantial.

Yeah, it's oak-backed, look.

Look at the thickness... EB: Oh, that's lovely.

PM: ..of the glass.

Look at the glass.

It's all bevel edged.

Oh, nice, yeah... And there's some marks on that.

That's not silver plate.

It's sterling silver, OK?

So it's solid silver.

It's from the Chester Office.

So that makes it quite rare, because there's a premium on Chester silver.

I'll tell you why.

Because the Assay Office was closed in 1962, so nothing came out of Chester after 1962.

I like it a lot.

I like that, don't you?

EB: Yeah, I really like it.

PM: It's 1916, PM: so it's got some age.

EB: Oh, wow!

You know, you think about the First World War, you know... Yeah.

I love the idea of thinking about what pictures have been in here... PM: Yeah.

EB: ..since 1916.

PM: Yeah.

VO: This item has a price tag of £100.

Should we try and get this and the corner piece?

Yeah, I'd like to get that for under 30 quid and I'd like to get that for under 100 quid.

See what we can do.

PM: Work your magic.

EB: (CHUCKLES SOFTLY) Paul?

DEALER: Hello.

EB: Hello.

How are you?

Hi, good, thanks.

How about yourself?

Good.

Erm, so many great things in your... in your shop.

Erm, two... two items I'm interested in.

The corner cabinet.

And wanted to know what would be the best price you could do for that.

We've got £50 on it.

I could do it for 25, which would be... EB: Wow!

DEALER: ..half the price.

OK.

The other item is this beautiful, very simple but gorgeous silver frame.

I...

I can come down to 65.

PM: Yes, please.

£65 and 25 for that.

Sold, my friend.

DEALER: Lovely.

EB: Let me get you some cash.

VO: Easy-peasy!

That's a total of £90.

So, they end their day with £180 left.

What was the first gig you ever went to?

PM: The first gig?

EB: Yeah.

I saw Queen in Penzance PM: at the Winter Gardens.

EB: Yeah.

And they were promoting their first single, the Seven Seas Of Rhye.

Wow, that's an amazing first gig!

It was an amazing gig.

It was quite an amazing gig.

VO: Rock and roll, eh?

And how are our other duo?

Well, we've had a good day, haven't we?

Yes.

Tomorrow, it's all about the shopping.

Got a lot to buy, haven't we... NS: Yeah.

MR: ..tomorrow?

Let's not stay out too late, cuz I think we need not beauty sleep, we need our antiques knowledge sleep.

MR: OK. Alright.

NS: That's what we need.

Heads down.

Big day tomorrow.

VO: Nighty night, then.

MUSIC: "Beautiful Ones" by Suede VO: It's a brand-new day on our Midlands antique adventure, and our celebrities are all charged up.

EB: Day two and I'm driving!

MR: You're raring to go.

MR: You're driving, yeah.

EB: Grr!

Yeah, perfect.

I can take in the countryside.

You bought quite a lot yesterday.

EB: Maybe.

MR: Yeah.

Yeah, no, I did, actually.

More than I thought I would.

How did you find the haggling process?

Erm, I think I'm firm but gentle.

VO: That's one way of describing it!

I have got Natasha to back me up, of course.

MR: You know, she... EB: Yeah, that's what I need.

I need hand-holding.

Yeah, yeah.

She looks like she can handle herself.

EB: Yeah.

VO: Cheeky!

Now, let's check in with the experts.

It's been great to tap into their stories, hasn't it?

NS: I mean... PM: Yes.

..what we should be jealous of is the... PM: Oh!

NS: ..one-on-one interviews.

PM: Yes, the green room.

NS: Oh!

The green room and the parties!

The green room!

Oh!

MR: In your heart of hearts, do you think you're gonna win?

Yeah.

Because in my heart of hearts, I'm pretty sure I'm gonna lose!

(THEY CHUCKLE) And I'm not... Well, to be fair, you need to put a bit more effort into today.

I know, yeah.

I'm going to lose at the moment because I've only got one thing to sell.

VO: Well, it's not over yet, and they've got just enough time to have a nosy at each other's goodies.

Excited to see what you've bought.

Kind of feel like we need some kind of fanfare for this EB: as we open the boot.

MR: OK.

The big...

The big reveal.

EB: (IMITATES FANFARE) There we go.

What about this blue plastic monstrosity?

It's not plastic!

Right, OK.

Right.

EB: Pick it up.

MR: Right, yeah.

EB: Go on.

Feel its girth.

MR: Yeah.

Oh, yeah.

No, you're right.

It's not...

It's not plastic.

Yeah.

I just like the kind of... the ostentatiousness of it.

VO: Why not?

Edith also bought a silver photo frame, a George III mahogany bow-fronted corner cupboard, and a mid-Victorian, gilt-framed picture...

I like it a lot.

VO: ..leaving her with 180 in the kitty.

Can I have a look?

Yeah.

It's got...

It's got some Scottish sort of theme to it... EB: Oh!

..for you.

EB: Is that especially for me?

MR: Yeah.

Yeah.

Are you hoping I'm gonna bid for this?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Loads, yeah.

Erm, if you could top my bid for it.

I paid... How much?

I paid £399 for that.

So if you could just top that.

No, I didn't, no, I paid 60 quid!

EB: I actually thought you had!

MR: I paid...

I paid 60 quid for the watch in the box.

VO: Mark has £340 left.

I don't think you've done too bad.

I'd like to dismiss it all MR: as worthless tat... EB: Yeah.

..he said, carefully choosing his words...

I'm slightly concerned about your watch in a box.

I feel like it needs to have its own theme tune as well.

BOTH: Watch in a box.

Right, OK... Well, let's see, eh?

EB: Shall we?

OK. VO: With Mark dropped off, DJ Edith's motoring to the outskirts of Wolverhampton.

The music scene hereabouts boasts Slade and Beverley Knight.

Also home to Jones of Shropshire.

EB: Right.

PM: This is it... EB: Let's see what they've got.

VO: Less chart topping, more antique shopping, thanks.

Time for Paul and Edith to spend some of that £180 they have left.

Aye, aye!

(CHUCKLES) This place is so big, you need a set of wheels on the inside.

VO: That's a "wheely" good idea!

Hoo!

(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC) EB: Paul?

Paul, quick.

PM: Yeah?

I've got a big fan here.

Have you?

(CHUCKLES) I love it!

Actually, this looks like something out of Back To The Future.

If you turn it on, I'm gonna blow away.

(THEY CHUCKLE) Number one fan, I like it.

VO: These two are full of hot air.

Keep looking.

Over to Cradley Heath, once the country's center of chain making.

Time for Mark to link up with Natasha in Bridale Architectural Antiques.

Gosh!

Brian's place is very eclectic and very brown, so I don't know how Mark's going to feel about it.

He did ask me specifically to keep him away from brown items.

We've already bought a bit of sycamore, so I don't know how he's going to feel about it.

But do you know what... how I feel about it?

I feel a job lot coming on.

I think this is exactly the kind of place where you can make an offer on a good few things at once.

VO: Sounds good.

But that's if Mark can ever find you, Natasha.

Well...what a warren this place is.

Ah!

Is that you?

I couldn't see, there's so much brown stuff in here, and you were...you were sort of blending in there.

This is my camouflage... for Brian's shop.

How are you?

Yeah, I'm alright.

I'm sort of, like, a bit bemused by this place.

It's kind of...

There's so much stuff in here, and it just seems to go on forever.

Why should I be looking out for then, do you think?

NS: Color.

MR: I like it.

A pop of color in this sea of brown.

Right, OK... OK. Alright then.

I'll...

Shouldn't be hard to spot.

It shouldn't be, no.

Well, I'll head this way, you head that way, and hopefully I'll find you again at some point.

At some point.

I'll take my jacket off if it helps.

MR: OK!

VO: Good luck, you two.

Back in Wolverhampton... PM: Yeah.

EB: There's no wood there, Paul.

PM: There's no wood!

PM: Do you know what?

EB: What?

You're making that look really easy!

(THEY CHUCKLE) It's just, like, one-handed like that...

The trick, the trick is to actually cut a straight line, so basically, this would... Oh, wow!

This is a saw for pit sawyers, two guys.

One would be the top dog, one the underdog... Clearly you!

The top dog would be on the tree.

You'd be in a pit underneath the tree trunk.

Yeah.

OK?

So the tree's felled.

Here it is, it's in one great big section, and we have to cut a straight line all the way through it to get a plank out.

Wow!

So this is late sort of 18th, early 19th century, OK?

It's really nice, it's all hand-forged.

Great pub decoration, you know?

It really is.

It's a bygone, it's a rural bygone.

What are they asking for it?

They're asking 75 quid.

It is... Ooh.

..worth £75, but we need to buy it for £40, really.

What do you think?

It's a bit of fun, I like it, but I think there's another treasure here for us to find.

VO: Get digging!

What's going on in Cradley Heath, then?

MR: So, Tash?

I... NS: Yes.

MR: Here's some color.

NS: What do you have?

MR: Tiles.

I was looking for tiles actually.

MR: Those are colorful.

NS: They are colorful.

Are they a bit twee?

Are you a...

They...

Undoubtedly!

Are you a twee sort of soul?

Are you a bit hand-knitted?

Well, not r...

When does...

When does twee become kind of retro kitsch?

When...

It's a fine line.

It's a very fine line.

Yes... And we may be on the wrong side of that fine line with these.

I think I know on which side of the line they fall... MR: (CHUCKLES) NS: But I mean, at the same time, it's a whacking great tile in each of your hands.

I think there are some selections of smaller tiles in here somewhere.

But the only problem is, I just don't know where to start.

This is not antique shopping as you know it.

No, no, no.

VO: No - but jolly good fun.

NS: Let's not count them out.

MR: No.

We seem to have found ourselves in a welding workshop, so if you see something that has age to it, is a proper antique, let's not count it out.

We want to come away with something.

MR: We do, yeah.

NS: OK. Oh!

We could buy a load of random planks of wood.

We could.

I've just tripped over one.

Right, I'm going to keep looking over here, and I'm actually looking for more tiles.

VO: Yes, crack on then.

Now, to Edith and Paul.

EB: Paul?

PM: Yeah?

Will you come and have a look at this, please?

PM: What?

EB: Erm, I mean, slightly predictable but something musical.

Oh, a harmonica!

Mm.

Or a gob iron, as the musos say today... Yeah, yeah, yeah.

In its original case... Oh, isn't that lovely?

Oh, it's well presented.

Boxed, no dents, hardly any scratches.

Isn't that lovely?

And the mechanism works really well as well.

Oh!

Do you know, I love the sound of the harmonica.

Yeah.

Do you think of anyone specific when you think of someone with...?

Oh, yes, wouldn't it be nice if it was Stevie Wonder's or... EB: Oh!

PM: ..or Bob Dylan's?!

Springsteen?

Great harmonica players.

Mm.

I'd say this is around about 1960, 1970.

This is a Chromonica, and they first hit the scene in the 1920s and '30s.

Shall I give it a blow?

Go on.

(PLAYS JAZZY MELODY) VO: Gee-whiz!

Natural.

A natural, yeah.

Hey!

And the crowd roar!

EB: (CHUCKLES) Yeah!

VO: Not quite Springsteen, eh?

This...

This sound has defined the sound of jazz and blues.

EB: Not that sound but the... PM: Not my sound but this... PM: particular instrument... EB: That instrument, yeah, EB: yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

PM: ..and Hohner as well, a great make.

I mean, they've been making musical instruments for over 100 years.

They're still made today in Germany.

The first harmonica was actually produced in 1822 in Germany.

VO: Priced to a tune of £70, I think it's time to get the center director Ulana involved.

EB: Ulana?

DEALER: Yes.

Hi!

Hi!

You OK?

Yeah, really good.

Erm, we love this, er, harmonica and really interested to buy it.

OK. 65's the best I could do for that, sorry!

EB: 65?

PM: We'll take it.

EB: 65, we'll take it.

DEALER: Yeah, that's perfect.

EB: Yeah?

DEALER: Yeah.

Amazing!

Right, here we are... VO: Oh, here we go again!

There we go, I'm going to leave this on the trunk for you.

DEALER: Yeah.

EB: Thank you very much.

VO: That harmonious buy - ha!

- brings Edith's shopping to a close, with £115 left unspent.

How are things going 10 miles away in Cradley Heath?

NS: Mark?

MR: Yeah?

Yeah, I think I've spotted something with a bit more panache than those printed tiles.

So these are hand-painted ornithological tiles.

A lovely little group of three.

There is a fourth one, but it's really chipped.

MR: OK. NS: These three seem to be in good nick, terracotta tiles.

This one, a little goose.

MR: Yeah!

NS: These are really nice.

So the stark contrast between these and the ones you were looking at... Those are hand-painted, you're saying?

NS: ..is the medium.

MR: OK. Hand-painted, not just the size.

How old are they?

Well, it's hard to say, because they're very much in a delft style, NS: a Dutch lowlands style... MR: Yeah, yeah.

But I think they're English delft.

VO: Delftware was made using baked clay that was then dipped in a bath of white opaque tin glaze, then decorated, then lead-glazed.

What I think makes them particularly English delft is the colors - those kind of blues, oranges, yellows.

MR: I really like them.

NS: And...

I do really like them, yeah.

Yeah.

Ornithological objects, at auction, attract a certain type of buyer.

Delft attracts a certain type of buyer.

MR: Yeah.

NS: I presume the same goes for English delft.

And I think... Well, I mean, it's always nice to buy a proper antique.

Yeah.

VO: That's the name of the game.

Come on, it's time to see owner Brian.

Ah, Brian, hard at work.

Well, I'm going to make it a bit easier for you, cuz I'll take a couple of tiles off your hands, so it'll save you clearing those out.

These ones with birds on that Tash has got.

DEALER: Yeah.

NS: Mm.

OK?

So, erm, what's your best deal on those, do you think?

DEALER: £25 each.

MR: £25 each.

Erm... What about £10 each?

No, I couldn't do that.

MR: Couldn't do that.

VO: Nice try.

MR: So, what about if I meet you halfway, 45 quid?

Yep, I'll go for that.

MR: You'll go for 45 quid?

DEALER: Yeah.

Thank you very much, Brian.

Pleasure doing business with you.

VO: Good old Brian!

MR: Cheers, Brian!

DEALER: Thank you!

MR: Thank you very much.

NS: Thanks, Brian.

VO: So Mark and Natasha have £295 left.

And off you go!

VO: Meanwhile, Edith and Paul have headed to the heart of Birmingham city.

VO: They've come to meet women's historian Dr Zoe Thomas to learn about one of Birmingham's great female innovators, Marie Bethell Beauclerc.

Hi, Zoe!

Welcome to the Birmingham & Midland Institute.

Come in... PM: Right, we'll follow you.

EB: Right.

VO: Marie was a pioneering female journalist.

Here in the Birmingham & Midland Institute, she gave important and popular lectures on shorthand.

So she was the first woman to actually pick up shorthand?

Erm, yeah.

Well, some other women were doing it, but she was the first person to report professionally in the whole country.

Like the Pall Mall Gazette even were writing about it in their newspaper, the first lady reporter.

So this was so unusual for the day.

Yes, it was massively unusual.

She really sort of broke down barriers in that regard.

VO: Born in London, Marie's father sadly died when she was five, leaving the family without an income, which meant she had to leave school.

We have this really exciting book that Marie found, erm, in some waste paper.

And many other children would probably just have sort of not thought any more about it... ..but she was really interested in it.

And basically, it's this book written by Isaac Pitman, and it's called The Phonographic Teacher, and she became obsessed with it.

Basically, it's a form of shorthand, which became really famous in the 19th century, and it's based around sounds.

It's using symbols to represent sounds.

OK. And it's a way of reporting, really, really quickly, events.

PM: Using those symbols.

Using the symbols, which can be dots and dashes and lines.

VO: Pitman's book exposed Marie to shorthand for the first time.

We don't know exactly why she was so fascinated with this little book, but my... Mm.

I think it's because very much the family was struggling so much to make money... PM: Sure.

EB: Mm.

..and she saw this as a way to perhaps contribute to the family.

VO: At 12, Marie and her family moved to Birmingham as her mother bought a grocery shop.

She helped out in the shop through her teens, as well as continuing to perfect her shorthand skills.

By the time that she was 18, she started to pick up some paid opportunities.

So there was a visiting researcher, and she worked as a shorthand assistant for them, helping them to sort of record events in the city.

Shorthand really became very famous in the 19th century and used by lots and lots more people, but it was especially important that she was doing this role as a woman.

Would it have been easy for her to find work in this field and to progress her career?

Erm, not at all, being really honest.

It's very difficult, and at every stage in her life, she was sort of desperately trying to find opportunities.

She was very reliant on certain men in Birmingham that really supported her.

And one, the most important man in her life in many ways, was someone called George Dawson, a very famous nonconformist preacher of the 19th century.

And he gave Marie her sort of first real job, in many ways, which was helping him, being his assistant, reporting for his newspaper, which was called the Birmingham Morning News.

But perhaps most importantly is she used her shorthand to offer the only account of his famous sermons and prayers and lectures... Wow!

So from her shorthand dictation, there is now an archive that everybody can see, an archive left, which is really important?

Yes.

If it wasn't for her, we wouldn't know what George Dawson had said.

VO: Marie's work with George Dawson cemented her as a successful journalist, and she became well-respected within phonetic circles.

She then began to pioneer the teaching of shorthand across institutes in Birmingham.

At this time, it was highly unusual for women to be teaching in such high-profile institutions.

The most famous of these was the private school Rugby School, where she became the first female teacher.

Her classes, in particular, were incredibly popular.

Often several hundred students would be in the room ZOE: with her, yeah... EB: Wow!

PM: Gosh!

ZOE: But she also began to teach typewriting as well, and she played a really important role in introducing the city of Birmingham to typewriting, and it becoming really important in sort of offices across the city as well.

VO: Sadly, ill health caused Marie to retire young before she died aged 51.

Very much ahead of her time, she will always be remembered for her pioneering contributions to progressing women's working opportunities.

VO: Mark and Natasha are back on the road.

I feel very confident about the tiles.

Do you?

I feel strangely cocky... Cocky?

..about...about the tiles.

Don't ever become cocky before an auction... Mark, if I can teach you one thing on this whole trip, never, ever become cocky before an auction... OK. You've jinxed it!

VO: Yeah, that's right - anything could happen.

They're cruising over to Wolverhampton and to their last shop of the road trip - Wolverhampton Vintage, Retro, Antiques & Crafts.

Let's hope this former church can answer their antique prayers.

MR: She's scary.

I think that, after this place is closed... ..and it's all dark, you come alive, don't you?

And wander the aisles for evermore.

VO: Oh, what an imagination.

With only two items bought, this duo need to delve deep.

Great picture of Tony Hancock.

Radio program, The Blo...

The Blood Donor and The Radio Ham, on vinyl.

95p!

That's a bargain, that.

The Best Of Peter Sellers.

Wow!

(CHUCKLES) VO: He's in his element.

There's some toys in here, like the tin toys.

I quite fancy buying a toy.

I love this spaceship.

NS: Yeah, it's... MR: But it's very rusty.

It's so frustrating.

If you don't have a box, you at least want good condition, don't you?

I know.

And... And also, I'd love for you to find something that really... Not necessarily you're buying with your head, but very much with your heart, something that means something to you, that connects with you NS: and just really... MR: Yeah.

..really talks to you for a certain reason.

NS: That's what we need to find.

MR: Yeah.

NS: That's what we need to find.

MR: Yeah.

So, eyes down for a full house.

Oh, look at this!

I...

This is in good condition.

NS: So no box but good condition is... MR: No box.

NS: ..a good thing.

MR: A good thing.

NS: What is it?

It's a little train with a gasoline tender with it.

I mean, it's 30 quid.

I imagine we might even lose money on it, but I like it anyway.

Erm... That's buying with your heart and not your head.

MR: Yeah.

NS: And I like that.

And there are collectors out there, and if they're feeling generous, well, who knows what they'll bid on the day?

MR: OK. VO: That's one happy expert.

But still more to find.

So... Oh, wow, this is cool.

An old slot machine, looks like it'd be on the end of the pier.

Does it work?

Let's see... (MACHINE WHIRS) Well, it sort of does.

Let's have a look.

Wow, look at all that old mechanism in there.

That's an amazing thing.

Tash?

NS: Yes... MR: Are you there?

(FOOTSTEPS APPROACH) Have look at this.

NS: Oh!

This place is huge!

(MACHINE WHIRS) (THEY CHUCKLE) NS: I lost you then.

MR: Yeah?

NS: What have you found?

What do you think of this?

I love this thing, look at this.

MR: It's a beautiful cabinet... NS: Mm.

..and it's an old sort of slot machine, "Pennies only".

The mechanism looks kind of original.

I guess it would have been on the end of the pier, would it?

I guess it's that amusements park... A little old amusement arcade thing, yeah... Yeah, that kind of area, a day out at the seaside - why not put your pennies in?

So what's this?

Like, '30s, '40s, '50s?

What is that sort of period, is it?

It looks like that.

I mean, the greatest indicator is the front, where it says, "Pennies only".

MR: Yeah.

NS: That font looks very much like Gill Sans font, which is very much a kind of '40s font... MR: Right.

NS: ..so that helps to date it.

We think of slot machines and fruit machines as such metal objects, so it's nice to see the nice natural material being used, that wooden case.

VO: Brown wood - Mark's favorite!

Ha!

OK, is it a particular maker?

Bre... "A Brenner product..." Oh.

Yeah, do you know something?

Brenner is a good name when it comes to making games NS: and game machines.

MR: Oh, right.

So...

I see no price tag.

I can see a sticky label was once there.

I need to prepare you that this is going to be big bucks.

VO: Brace yourselves - it could be out of your budget.

Well, if we can't afford it, we can't afford it, but at least I do like it.

VO: Well, that's a good start.

Mark, I think we might be in souvenir territory.

MR: Yeah, yeah.

NS: OK, I think we might be NS: North Africa... MR: Yeah.

..you're on your holidays, you're coming back with a flavor of the country you've just visited, Morocco, Tunisia or the like.

But souvenir doesn't necessarily mean low quality or just tat.

Quite a nice lantern.

Looks a little bit ecclesiastical, but I suppose that may be because it's hanging in a church window.

MR: But it... NS: I think you're right.

It does sort of look Moorish.

But I'm thinking, who wouldn't want that in their gazebo or something... Who wouldn't?

Who wouldn't?

VO: My thoughts exactly.

I can see it's £65.

Right.

I don't think it would have been £65 when it was purchased as a souvenir.

No, no, OK...

So the person who's buying it at auction NS: just has a spot for it... MR: Yeah.

..and they're willing to pay whatever they want for it.

MR: Yeah.

NS: It's not a dealer's lot.

MR: So we need to get... NS: It's for the private buyer.

We need to get it at souvenir price.

We do.

VO: Come on, Mark.

Time to sweet-talk dealer Dave.

We know what we've got left.

Mm-hm.

Erm, I'm prepared to spend it all.

NS: Oh that looks inviting.

MR: And, erm, I'm pre... MR: Oh!

NS: (CHUCKLES) NS: Dave, hi!

MR: Dave.

DEALER: Hi.

MR: Hi, how are you?

Alright, thank you.

I'm buttering you up to try and get a good deal.

It looked like it.

I really love the little, erm, Rock Island line... DEALER: Oh, yes.

MR: ..Japanese tin train.

Yes, yes.

I really like that.

So that's £30, so that's OK. Then I also like that penny slot machine... DEALER: Yes.

MR: ..the three barrels.

DEALER: 220.

MR: 220.

The lantern, the sort of Moorish souvenir Moroccan lantern MR: or whatever it is... DEALER: Ah, yes, yes.

That's 65, so that would be 250...

So that would be 315, wouldn't it, MR: for all three... DEALER: Right.

Erm, and so it just so happens that, er, it comes to 315, and I just happen to have 295.

So that would seem to be a done deal, wouldn't it?

DEALER: You would think.

MR: Wouldn't you?

VO: He's brave.

DEALER: It's a deal.

MR: OK, great!

MR: Now I'm suddenly energized.

NS: Thank you, Dave...

Pleasure doing business with you.

VO: Mark strikes again.

Good deal.

Having paid £220 for the slot machine, 25 for the train and 50 for the Moroccan light, they're all spent up.

There was a time, Mark, when I didn't think we'd buy as many antiques as we have.

NS: So... MR: I... ..we got there in the end.

We totally smashed it.

We went for the long game.

NS: Yeah.

It was a marathon, not a sprint.

NS: Exactly.

MR: And other cliches.

So we are the tortoise, they're the hare.

Maybe, maybe, yeah... Maybe, well... And so... Well, let's hope it finishes up that way, yeah.

PM: Have you enjoyed this whole experience?

EB: I've loved it.

There's so many elements to it I've loved.

Exactly.

You know, we're all winners at the end of the day really, erm, but let's hope it's us!

(THEY CHUCKLE) VO: Cheeky!

Nighty night all.

Auction day has arrived, and our celebrities are getting in the mood.

So I turned up in my '80s-inspired shoulder-padded outfit.

I'm Marty and you're Doc, but you have no idea what I'm talking about.

I've never seen the film.

I can't believe it!

I know.

I've never seen Star Wars either.

Oh!

But you might win the auction today!

I'm thinking I might lose more than anyone's ever lost.

I'm thinking... Do you remember Nick Leeson, rogue trader?

EB: Yeah!

MR: I think I'm going to be the rogue trader of Antiques Road Trip.

VO: Oh my, oh my!

This pair of rascals have scoured the Midlands for the finest antiques and are now heading to Ludlow, Hedley Hall, where their antiques experts are waiting.

NS: Are you nervous?

Yes, very nervous.

I'm always nervous before an auction.

I think it's going to be close.

NS: It will be close.

PM: It'll be close, yeah.

We'll all make some losses we didn't bank on... NS: Mm.

PM: ..and one or two surprises.

And if it all goes terribly wrong, we can all jump in the DeLorean, set the date, and go back in time and do it all again.

VO: And just in the nick of time, here come double trouble.

Their items have winged their way to Golding Young Auctions in Lincolnshire and will be sold by auctioneer Colin Young.

Selling at £48... VO: Mark shelled out the full £400 on his five lots, but what's caught Colin's eye?

The delft tiles, lovely colors, lovely condition.

I think there'll be plenty of collectors for them.

VO: Edith, on the other hand, spent £285 on her five lots.

Thoughts, Colin?

COLIN: The 19th century Bohemian overlaid glass vase is a really nice example.

It's a really deep, thick change of color.

You've got that blue ground to it, raised in white at quite a depth, and also heightened in gilt as well.

A few little bit of rubs, but overall I think it's a good thing.

VO: The auction is open to online and commission bids across the globe.

Right, showtime!

PM: Are you ready for this?

EB: Yeah.

MR: Shall we try it?

PM: Let's try it, shall we?

EB: Good luck!

MR: Shall we start then?

VO: First up is Mark's Moroccan light.

£20, everybody.

20.

NS: Oh, hold on.

COLIN: 10 to go then, surely.

COLIN: 10.

NS: Oh, Mark, what's happening?

COLIN: £10.

MR: 10.

COLIN: £10?

PM: Come on!

Pound, anybody, pound?

Pound?!

NS: A pound?

One is bid.

One.

Two, three.

Four, five.

COLIN: Six now then, six... NS: He's struggling to get six!

MR: Six?!

COLIN: Seven bid, eight now.

Mark, remember we bought this cuz you love lanterns.

£9 for the Moroccan lamp.

At 12 bid.

We're going to be here some time to get to 50 aren't we?

All done then?

Selling at £12.

NS: £12.

MR: Not bad!

EB: £12.

Not bad, we only lost, er... what, 38 quid?

VO: Hm, not the brightest start.

It didn't light up the saleroom, did it?

Oh, there you go, don't you start.

VO: Ha-ha!

Moving on, it's Edith's mid-'60s harmonica.

£20 for the harmonica.

£20, 20.

10 to go then, surely?

10, anybody, at £10... EB: Come on.

COLIN: 10.

Oh, no, it's happening to you!

Fiver bid.

Five, six.

£6 bid... EB: What?!

COLIN: Seven now do I see?

At £6 I'm bid, looking for seven now then.

At £6 I'm bid, seven now then.

£7 bid, at seven.

Looking for eight now then.

At £7 bid.

Eight bid, nine now do I see?

£8 I'm bid, nine now do I see?

At £8 I'm bid.

Nine, nine bid, nine.

10 again now then.

At £9 bid.

We have a new bidder, 10.

At 10 bid.

Hammer's up then, we're done, we're finished, I will sell at £10.

NS: Oh!

PM: 10 quid?!

EB: (YELLS) PM: Oof!

VO: That did not play out well.

Does that mean you've lost more than us on the first item?

EB & PM: Yes!

MR: Oh, good.

Straightaway on our first item!

VO: The only way is up!

Next, Mark's pocket watch in a box.

We're already up to 30 at the internet... NS: Oh, good, good, good.

MR: Brilliant.

EB: Get in.

38 bid, 40 now do I see?

40 bid, 42... NS: Oh-oh-oh-oh!

COLIN: 42.

45.

NS: Yes, yes, yes... EB: Oh, come on!

MR: Come on!

NS: It's a creeper.

£48 bid.

Bid me 50 now.

Going then at £48... We didn't lose a fortune on that.

VO: Better than last time.

PM: That wasn't bad!

Well...

It wasn't good, but it wasn't bad.

MR: No, it wasn't amazing.

VO: Next up, it's Edith's silver frame.

£30 is bid, at 30, looking for two now then.

£30 I'm bid.

Two, anybody else now then?

Maiden bid has it.

32.

35.

COLIN: 38 bid.

40 bid.

NS: Here we go, here we go.

MR: Oh!

COLIN: Two do I see now then?

COLIN: £40.

Two now, 42, 45... PM: Come on, a bit more.

COLIN: 48 now.

MR: This is going quite well.

COLIN: At 55 now.

EB: (GASPS) COLIN: 60.

EB: Yes!

£60 bid.

65 takes out my book, 65.

EB: Yes!

PM: Oh!

Online now, £65 I'm bid.

65.

70.

I will sell at 70.

NS: Not too shabby.

PM: £70.

EB: Oh!

MR: Profit!

Just.

VO: But the first profit, guys.

Yeah, well done.

So this is, this is good.

We've turned the corner now.

VO: Exactly!

Hoping to cement a top bid are Mark's English delft tiles.

I have multiple bids everywhere for this, and I'm going to start over here at 100, 110... COLIN: 120 now.

NS: Yes!

110 bid, 120 now do I see?

At 110... PM: Now you like the auction!

COLIN: 120 now do I see?

NS: Oh, yes, Mark!

EB: Wow!

20 now do I see?

At 110, it's only bid at 110.

Are we all done then?

This is short-lived.

At 110, you're going to have to bid me again.

120, 130 now surely?

120 bid... EB: It's amazing!

PM: Gosh, he's smiling now!

It's on the market, and selling at 120.

MR: Whoa!

PM: Brilliant!

EB: Whoa, hey... MR: High five!

VO: That's what I'm talking about.

That's nearly tripled our money on those!

VO: Let's see if Edith can do as well with her corner cabinet.

80 bid.

85 surely?

85, come 90.

NS: Oh, are you so chuffed?

Looking for 90 now.

At £85 I'm bid.

90 now.

Just have another look at it.

85, bid me 90 now... NS: That's amazing!

COLIN: 85 I'm bid.

Bid me any more now then.

Goes at £85.

EB: Yes!

MR: Really good.

PM: Bring it on!

That's more like it!

EB: Yeah!

PM: Yes!

VO: Hey, things are hotting up.

Congratulations.

PM: Game on, we're back in it!

EB: Yeah!

VO: Now, in the race is Mark's mid-20th century toy train.

COLIN: 12 do I see?

NS: Oh, it's moving quickly.

COLIN: 15 now.

15 bid.

NS: (GASPS) Oh, oh.

COLIN: 18 surely?

MR: Come on!

16.

At 16 bid.

(THEY CHUCKLE) COLIN: Can we continue the excitement?

MR: Oh, it's... No, we appear to have hit the buffers.

All done at £16?

NS: OK. EB: Oh, wow!

That was a really useful engine.

(THEY CHUCKLE) VO: Not quite on the right track this time.

We liked that little train.

PM: I loved that little train actually.

I think it was worth more than that.

VO: Can Edith's mid-Victorian picture do any better?

COLIN: £10.

EB: Oh... PM: Oh come on!

EB: What?!

10, 12.

15.

It's creeping.

18 now then.

18 bid.

20.

£20 bid.

Two again now for the picture.

All done, are we then?

NS: Oh!

EB: Oh...

Yes!

Bad luck, I mean.

VO: No, what a wash-out.

All of a sudden, I'm not upright any more, I'm slumped.

NS: Yeah.

VO: Mark's last lot - can a penny slot pull in a profit?

50.

NS: Oh, no!

COLIN: 60.

70... NS: Is it happening?

Oh, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on.

90.

100, 110, 120.

30, 140, 150.

You're there.

NS: Oh, it's so close... 160, 170, 180 on the book.

190 now.

190 bid.

EB: Got this!

MR: Come on.

MR: Come on.

COLIN: 220 now then.

NS: (GASPS) 220, 240.

PM: Yes!

(THEY EXCLAIM) COLIN: 260 now.

NS: (CHUCKLES) Look at you!

260.

260 is now bid.

NS: Yes, Mark!

260 online, my bid is in France, selling at 260.

NS: Oh!

EB: Yay!

MR: Totally happy with that!

PM: Well done!

NS: Yes!

VO: Et voila!

The winning bid came from France.

PM: Well done, 260 quid.

EB: In France as well!

MR: Totally happy with that.

PM: Yeah.

I thought we might absolutely take a bath on that.

VO: Last item remaining.

It's Bowman's bohemian vase.

I have so, so many bids, and I'm going to start with my lowest bid on here, which is 20.

NS: Oh.

PM: That was a wind-up!

NS: What a tease!

What a tease!

60, 70, 80, 90, 100.

NS: Oh, he's moving, he's moving.

MR: Wow!

COLIN: 30.

EB: Oh my God!

..40, 50, 60... PM: Oh!

COLIN: ..70, 80.

190, 200 now... NS: Just stop!

PM: Don't stop... 200 surely?

190 bid... EB: 200 quid!

(CHUCKLES) COLIN: 200 now?

200 do I see?

200 bid, 200.

And we sell then at £200.

Oh my days!

That's brilliant, well done.

He said through gritted teeth.

NS: (SNORTS) MR: Er, yeah, that... Just going to, uh, recline back here.

Oh, yeah, why not?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, chill out!

NS: Relax.

Relax.

MR: Yeah.

VO: You deserve a lie-down after that.

Great work!

NS: It's done.

MR: It's done.

NS: I think it's really tight.

PM: Well, I haven't kept a tally of that.

EB: No, I've no idea.

NS: No.

No, I...

I haven't.

VO: Good job I'm here then!

Ha!

VO: Mark and Natasha commenced with £400.

After auction fees, they finish on £373.92.

A sterling effort!

VO: Edith and Paul also started with £400 but made a small profit after auction costs, so have ended up with £430.70.

They are crowned today's winners!

Hurrah!

Results aside, I have had a lovely time.

MR: Yeah.

EB: Nice to catch up with you.

Yeah, it's lovely to see you.

It really...

It really was.

And next time we do it, we'll go to a couple of shops and buy a couple of things, but we'll make sure that we've got between sort of three and five in the afternoon set aside for afternoon tea, MR: one of those big racks... EB: Yeah!

..with the sandwiches on the bottom and the cakes on the top.

There was none of that, was there?

EB: None of that, with... MR: There was none of that.

Yeah, with the... with the crusts cut off.

MR: Exactly, exactly.

EB: Yeah, yeah.

MR: So next time we'll... EB: Do that.

We'll do it like that.

Yeah.

VO: Sounds good to me!

Big hugs, luvvies!

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